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Post by stompie on Oct 31, 2019 15:39:29 GMT
No idea. Sending you my address so you can write to me. Did you write to me because I have never received anything?
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Post by hoyabella on Nov 6, 2019 18:00:52 GMT
Did you write to me because I have never received anything? Stompie, sorry for not giving you feedback earlier. I am sending you a direct message
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Post by doultonmyra on Nov 8, 2019 18:10:32 GMT
I wish I could write better letters. I don't have many regular pen-pals and that's partly my own varied and wacky schedule and partly my personality. I am a bi-polar letter writer. I don't think I am a bi-polar person (except mildly) but my letter writing persona ranges from the long confessional to the terse Morse code style.
I can discuss current politics, but I get virulent and try to avoid it. I could discuss my health but how tedious for all! I can rhapsodize about my cats, but that's only for people who understand that I believe that all cats are constantly, in the spirit of David Copperfield or Pip, composing their autobiographies. My eccentricities have led me to believe I am unfit for public consumption! I have quirks--I'm an atheist who fetishizes Christmas cards and carols;
Sometimes I struggle to write something that might be meaningful so I send poetry out. Poems not by myself, but others. And I know that most people anticipate a poem with about as much pleasure as they would consider a massive plague of Hansen's Disease.
I love to ask questions but I fear that they will alienate people who believe I am being intrusive. My questions might range from a simple "how is your day?" to a sudden "Describe the toxic effects of the family dynamics of your great-great-grandparents and how you have absorbed them into your life." If I give free flow to my thoughts I am equally likely to proselytize about Puccini, Alexander Pope, politics, and possums.
I guess what I look for is toleration and I will extend great toleration in return. I'm no intellectual, but my daily life seems to oscillate between 2019 and 1879 with a tiny bit of 1920's modernism and fragmentation.
If you have read this far and want to indulge my in my "Holiday card" frenzy, please let me know! I'm starting to send them overseas.
In short, I am about 6 types of letter writers but I am troubled about my own lack of consistency.
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Post by Gary S on Nov 9, 2019 2:09:19 GMT
... I have quirks--I'm an atheist who fetishizes Christmas cards and carols; ... If I give free flow to my thoughts I am equally likely to proselytize about Puccini, Alexander Pope, politics, and possums. ... If you have read this far and want to indulge my in my "Holiday card" frenzy, please let me know! I'm starting to send them overseas. I write about possums fairly often and armadillos as well. I figure you only live once so why hold yourself back and to be perfectly honest I have a lot of armadillos and possums that invade my life and yard. I also send out way too many Christmas cards but to be honest I'm not sure I have any religious themed ones. I rather go for quaint (and cheap but I have to like the design so it isn't just about the cash) over those that lean towards "Jesus is the reason for the Season".
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Post by ginny on Dec 16, 2019 18:32:03 GMT
Do you have any realistic, specific, applicable tips for writing better letters? I never thought my letter were so bad but given the ridiculously low response rate to the mail I send to new people, I have begun to think that I might be wrong in my approach to penpals (especially the new ones) and that perhaps people find my letters outright bad. I know that tastes and expectations vary but I think I could really use some *realistic, specific, applicable* tips for writing better letters. Not sure if this topic is still active, but I'd say that a lot depends on whether or not you've had some kind of interaction with people before you start writing and how you got their addresses. Before the Internet, I used to obtain potential penpal addresses from what's known as 'friendship books' (there's a pretty good definition on Wikipedia here: en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Friendship_book ), and usually, you had nothing but their address, maybe a few hobbies, whether or not they had kids and perhaps their birthday. So when I wrote to these folks, I usually came up with a 'cv style letter' - not too long, but not too short, either, so they'd get an idea of who's writing to them. I would list some hobbies and interests, maybe mention why I wrote to them in the first place (sometimes that was simply because they liked an actor I liked, or lived in a place I was interested in... or because I liked their handwriting!). Now that we have the internet, there's usually some kind of interaction before writing - whether it's via a penpal profile on a penpal site or via social media (Instagram, Facebook, Twitter - I have found penpals on all of these networks. I'm not on FB anymore, though, but know that there are a lot of penpal related groups there). So, of course, you get a better picture of what sort of humour someone likes, what hobbies they have etc., and you can introduce yourself via e-mail - so you don't have to write about all the basics in your first letter.
My 'advice' / tip would be: Write the kind of letter you'd like to receive as a introduction. If you receive a first letter, what are some no-gos for you, what do you like? Are you interested in people's family background or not? If you are - say a bit about your own background, and people will most likely respond in kind. Same goes for other topics.
Just an idea, of course :-)
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Post by hoyabella on Dec 19, 2019 17:16:44 GMT
I love to ask questions but I fear that they will alienate people who believe I am being intrusive. Thsnk you for your reply :-) I like the idea of sending poems and I think some of my penpals would like to receive one. Of course, like you, not my poem. I don't write poetry.
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Post by hoyabella on Dec 19, 2019 17:19:49 GMT
My 'advice' / tip would be: Write the kind of letter you'd like to receive as a introduction. It sounds like a good idea, thank you Ginny. Since I started this topic, I begun to think that maybe I was simply not lucky with some potential penfriends. I am not sure but of course it is a possibility. Now I am thinking about the Incowrimo :-p
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Post by ginny on Dec 19, 2019 17:25:10 GMT
My 'advice' / tip would be: Write the kind of letter you'd like to receive as a introduction. It sounds like a good idea, thank you Ginny. Since I started this topic, I begun to think that maybe I was simply not lucky with some potential penfriends. I am not sure but of course it is a possibility. Now I am thinking about the Incowrimo :-p You are very welcome. Good luck, and if you fancy a German penpal... I'm here :-)
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Post by christyotwisty on Jan 7, 2020 15:27:15 GMT
I suppose she did not mean anything bad but her letter showed how distant and different we are now. Or maybe we have always been but never realized. Thank you for all the tips! Maybe it's the insomniac anxiety rising, or the slow recognition that I was spoiled by US Postal Service (still am), but in two instances where longterm acquaintances took initiative to reconnect with me, I mailed a penned, upbeat reply to each within hours, and have not heard back (November 4 2019, December 8 2019). These are both US addresses.
I drove over the border to mail to them so they'd hear from me three to eight days faster. I know the USPS is not at fault. It can't be "I lost your address" because I have online message options with both these people.
Every year at the beginning of InCoWriMo I review Lewis Carroll's "Eight or Nine Words About Letter-Writing" and then by June or July I seem to dismiss them in favour of "free-form monkey mind" scribblings. This year my aim is to compensate for 2019's turbulence with existing and neglected pen pals, and to write InCoWriMo "fresh prospects" with very low expectations.
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Post by ginny on Jan 7, 2020 15:58:16 GMT
Maybe it's the insomniac anxiety rising, or the slow recognition that I was spoiled by US Postal Service (still am), but in two instances where longterm acquaintances took initiative to reconnect with me, I mailed a penned, upbeat reply to each within hours, and have not heard back (November 4 2019, December 8 2019). These are both US addresses.
I drove over the border to mail to them so they'd hear from me three to eight days faster. I know the USPS is not at fault. It can't be "I lost your address" because I have online message options with both these people.
Every year at the beginning of InCoWriMo I review Lewis Carroll's "Eight or Nine Words About Letter-Writing" and then by June or July I seem to dismiss them in favour of "free-form monkey mind" scribblings. This year my aim is to compensate for 2019's turbulence with existing and neglected pen pals, and to write InCoWriMo "fresh prospects" with very low expectations.
Just to clarify: Did I get that right - you mean you haven't heard back from people you've sent letters to in November and December?
Mind you, if that's the case, I'd say they'd be super-fast if they had replied by now. Thanksgiving and Christmas (both in case of the November letter) happened in between, so your friends might have been busy with preparations, and there might have been family visits etc.
It's lovely that you wrote back so quickly to let them know how excited you were to hear from them again, and I'm sure they appreciated that. But I wouldn't think it's a bad sign that they haven't responded yet.
That being said, I hope you'll hear from them soon! Have a wonderful day :-)
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Post by christyotwisty on Jan 7, 2020 16:07:42 GMT
Indeed, I was surprised to read your post from another topic in which a US mailpiece postmarked Dec 11 just now reached you. It also mollified me, as I was feeling abject (hours before the arrival of a US Christmas card and letter). If I don't hear from them, my heart is open enough and mailboxes big enough to allow others to fill the void. When I lived in the US, three to five days delivery across the 48 contiguous states was the norm. Now I'm here, US takes six to thirteen days, France and UK mail takes four-six. Maybe I'll soon learn what the average mail delivery speed to and from Deutschland is.
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Post by ginny on Jan 7, 2020 21:27:48 GMT
Indeed, I was surprised to read your post from another topic in which a US mailpiece postmarked Dec 11 just now reached you. It also mollified me, as I was feeling abject (hours before the arrival of a US Christmas card and letter). If I don't hear from them, my heart is open enough and mailboxes big enough to allow others to fill the void. When I lived in the US, three to five days delivery across the 48 contiguous states was the norm. Now I'm here, US takes six to thirteen days, France and UK mail takes four-six. Maybe I'll soon learn what the average mail delivery speed to and from Deutschland is.
I'd say it's best to give it some time. If you don't hear from your friends, it doesn't necessarily mean they don't *want* to write. Maybe they do, but they have things happening in their lives that keep them away from their desk for a while? A sick child? An older relative? A (family) health issue? An accident? Or perhaps issues at work?
Also, you don't know how long it took your letters to reach their destination, and then you don't know how long it took your friends to put pen to paper, plus maybe their letters got stuck in the system. There are so many unfathomable parameters here!
Around this time of the year (early December to mid-January), mail often comes with a delay in my experience - because of the sheer masses that are mailed for Christmas. The letter from Guam that was in my mailbox today was posted on Dec. 16, so it took its sweet time, but the last letter from this particular penpal (in August) only took four days. I'm still waiting for a letter from Luxembourg (one of my neighbour countries!) that was posted right before Christmas, by the same token, I got a letter from France the other day that only took 3 days. Usually, mail from the US, Canada and Australia / New Zealand takes 4-6 work days, so that's not too bad. If I don't hear from someone in a while, I usually will send them an e-mail, asking how they are doing, but 'a while' means several months to me. Admittedly, I'm rather lenient about time spans. I think in 41 years of writing to penpals, I've become very patient with these things :-)
Anyway - best of luck :-) I'm sure you'll have something in your mailbox soon!
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