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Post by emeraldscribbles on Feb 12, 2021 19:12:24 GMT
Ha, I was just thinking that many in this topic mention they like to see a photo of their penpal, but would never ask. At the same time, I agree with emeraldscribbles that it would feel somehow weird to send a (portrait type) photo of myself, if not asked. So... you see where this leads to Exactly!! Anyone who I've ever written to knows how I can ramble on and on about my hobbies, so I don't feel as weird sending a picture of me related to that..."here's a picture of me at so-and-so waterfall" etc. But just a portrait, even a random selfie...I'd feel weird sending one.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Feb 13, 2021 9:01:52 GMT
For me it's not important to have a picture and I don't ask. But if my penpals have a photo in their profile or post pictures of themselves on Instagram, I feel somewhat urged to send one of me sooner or later, even if that's only by e-mail, to remedy that imbalance.
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Post by penguy on Feb 14, 2021 5:06:09 GMT
I really don't need a photo. To me I sort of like not knowing, it's like reading a book, you can create your own characters. I think I have sort of a mental image of my pen pals, probably completely incorrect. I don't mind receiving a photo. If someone is really curious they can look at my Facebook page. I must say I look a bit different these days, I haven't had a haircut since February, think I can now have a pony tail, and I now have a goatee since it works better with a mask than a full beard. It's my COVID look! Google maps was mentioned. I had fun with a long time pen pal, he knows my address so he went on google maps and took the little man and put him in front of my house. I gave him driving instructions and he virtually drove and found where the Arts Center where I make my pots was, my coffee shop, the college. So he was able to take a virtual drive around town. I suppose he and I could have taken a virtual drive to the virtual coffee shop and stopped and had a virtual coffee together and set up our iPads and done FaceTime and had real coffee, virtually. Strange world! Vertolive it is -11˚F (-25˚C) and feels like -31˚F (-35˚C). It is supposed to get down to -17˚F tonight. It is all Ole's fault, the cold comes down from Canada. vertolive ,
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Post by eefa on Feb 15, 2021 13:13:59 GMT
ginny My answers to your questions would be "Not Important" and "No". I find it bizarre that there are people who would expect that you know what your pen pal looks like. I mean I don't mind if people do know what I look like or if I know what they look but I do think it's lovely to have no unconscious biases preconceptions in place before building up a written relationship. I don't think i've ever sent a photo of myself in a letter though I have included some of my dog or sunrises or the beach (normally if some interest has been expressed already). I always enjoy receiving photos of places/objects from my penpals. radellaf , Catida I have googled street addresses before but very rarely and only because something was mentioned in the letter for example that caught my interest and made me want to see the general area. I do feel guilty doing it though, as if it's intrusive. Having said that it wouldn't bother me if somebody street viewed my address.
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Post by stompie on Feb 15, 2021 13:24:48 GMT
I think if I was corresponding with a convict I would want a picture, just in case they escaped! Or were released on parole!
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Post by ginny on Feb 15, 2021 16:56:16 GMT
ginny My answers to your questions would be "Not Important" and "No". I find it bizarre that there are people who would expect that you know what your pen pal looks like. I mean I don't mind if people do know what I look like or if I know what they look but I do think it's lovely to have no unconscious biases preconceptions in place before building up a written relationship. I don't think i've ever sent a photo of myself in a letter though I have included some of my dog or sunrises or the beach (normally if some interest has been expressed already). I always enjoy receiving photos of places/objects from my penpals. radellaf , Catida I have googled street addresses before but very rarely and only because something was mentioned in the letter for example that caught my interest and made me want to see the general area. I do feel guilty doing it though, as if it's intrusive. Having said that it wouldn't bother me if somebody street viewed my address. You know what really, really baffled me? That the person I discussed this with said she was looking out for true friendship and that meant she preferred to have a pic to see if the person was real. I scratched my head over that. But I must say it was interesting to discuss the topic - I hadn't thought it could be such an issue with some people.
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Post by DJW1066 on Feb 15, 2021 17:16:56 GMT
When I see the movie version of books, or see historical images of people I've only read about, there's often a dissonance with the image I had conjured in my mind's eye. Pen pal pictures may be the same.
I rather like the idea of not knowing what my pen pals look like, or how they looked on the particular occasion the picture was taken.
But that may just reflect my personal aversion to having my picture taken.
But it also opens up the question of whether to meet penpals in person, or on skype/facetime/zoom?
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Post by ginny on Feb 16, 2021 16:08:31 GMT
When I see the movie version of books, or see historical images of people I've only read about, there's often a dissonance with the image I had conjured in my mind's eye. Pen pal pictures may be the same. I rather like the idea of not knowing what my pen pals look like, or how they looked on the particular occasion the picture was taken. But that may just reflect my personal aversion to having my picture taken. But it also opens up the question of whether to meet penpals in person, or on skype/facetime/zoom? I have met several of my penpals in person over the years, some multiple times, and it's always been fun. Usually, I had a photo before we met, but that wasn't the case with everyone. One person I picked up at a busy train station... she had described herself in a letter and said casually 'Just look out for the shortest girl with the biggest backpack you can see', and we knew each other instantly... as soon as she came off the train I recognized her!
Two meetings (out of dozens in over 40 years of corresponding with various people from all over the world) didn't go super-well, but weren't disastrous, either, all other personal meetings were fine and added an extra dimension to the relationship.
Skype / facetime / zoom are a huge turnoff for me even with people I know well, and I avoid that sort of thing at all cost.
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Suennschien
Crayons
Posts: 29
Looking for Penpals?: Yes. Global penpals welcome
Country I live in is: Germany
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Post by Suennschien on Feb 17, 2021 18:01:48 GMT
A photo isn’t important at all and I don’t ask for it. I don’t google my penpals either. Why should I? I really like to get to know each other through our letters
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Post by distractedmom on Feb 17, 2021 20:05:05 GMT
A photo isn’t important at all and I don’t ask for it. I don’t google my penpals either. Why should I? I really like to get to know each other through our letters This is how I feel in theory. In practice, my curiosity sometimes gets the best of me.
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Post by radellaf on Feb 18, 2021 2:25:31 GMT
A photo isn’t important at all and I don’t ask for it. I don’t google my penpals either. Why should I? I really like to get to know each other through our letters This is how I feel in theory. In practice, my curiosity sometimes gets the best of me. Exactly.
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Post by radellaf on Feb 19, 2021 21:13:43 GMT
Got two letters in today. One felt unevenly thick. It has a couple of small photos, on regular photo paper, glued to pages of the letter. I guess instigated by my sending a photo of me with my (Wendy's) dog in a ridiculous front-carrier. Hope she didn't feel obligated to photo-reciprocate, but rather had fun with it. If I was more comfortable and confident with page layout software (or even that abominable MS Word) I'd try making up pseudo-collage printed pages. Two A5 on an A4 Kakuyo sheet adds to the printing challenge. Easier, computer-wise, to print 4-up on a sheet of 28lb paper and cut them apart.
It was really cool to see her photo. Not at _all_ what I was expecting. I don't think it'll affect what I write, or my attitude while writing. It's just interesting to see.
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Post by katiel on Feb 21, 2021 17:12:18 GMT
I really like having pictures of penpals, or seeing their pictures on Instagram, etc, because it’s kind of fun to see what they’re like outside letters too, and get a peek at their everyday life.
On the flip side, I definitely don’t *need* to see pictures. I have some pen friends that I’ve enjoyed corresponding with for years, but have never seen pictures of them. Theoretically, I could pass them in the street, and never even know. And that’s fine, too!
I guess I could go either way. I’m happy with whatever they’re comfortable with. 🙂
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Post by sunshine2170 on Jul 20, 2021 0:15:53 GMT
Very interesting topic indeed. I google my PO Box and it was interesting to see all the pictures on there that I had never seen before hahaha... Perhaps nice eventually... say, if you were to meet up somewhere, and instead of saying the person with a flower in the button hole, sitting at a table in a cafe writing letters with a sky-blue-pink Lamy fountain pen.... This reminds me of my favourite movie "You've Got Mail" where she got stood up. so a photo would be nice if you were to meet up. Doesn't bother me either way but I do get an impression of someone in my mind, then when I see a photo IRL I get quite a shock (not in a bad way). penguy 's photo was an impression change for me
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Post by Gilly on Aug 16, 2021 11:55:41 GMT
How on earth did I miss this topic back in February? When I first started writing to penpals in the Dark Ages of the 80's (before the wonders of FB and t'internet) we often used to send a photo but nowadays I think it's not so much a common thing to do. Probably because folk tend to occasionally (or often!) post pics on Instagram, Facebook etc. I personally am not bothered about what a person looks like....but I will admit I enjoy looking up where they live on Google Partly because I'm a right nosey moo but also because I just love to see the different house styles. My flat isn't on Street View unfortunately as I live in a courtyard just off the main road....but you CAN get a general view from above Where the red, black & white cars are parked, I'm the flat on the left-hand corner It's a nice quiet courtyard and a bit of a suntrap....and just a few minutes' walk from my allotment so I'm happy here Now that Neil and I are separated I think I'll be here till I pop my clogs Gilly's Hoose!
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