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Post by annavalerious on Mar 30, 2016 6:31:24 GMT
How would you feel if you received an anonymous thank you letter? I feel a bit stupid but I have to confess... I sent one. Nothing creepy, of course!! My son has always had some trouble socializing and he's a very shy kid. It took an enormous effort and patience to help him and so far, he's doing better. But there was still a problem: he loves soccer and always wanted to join a team, but he was afraid of going alone without me, and not knowing the kids there. The first week it was awful. I could see he really, really wanted to train soccer and, at the same time, he was so anxious as he didn't know the kids well yet. But we told him he had to try. As I saw it was difficult for him, I spoke to his soccer coach. He has a group of 30 kids to take care of, but he took the time to help my son and I have to tell you that after 3 months in the team, he's a completely different kid. I don't know what this coach did, but it worked. My son admires him so much and all he talks about is soccer. Now... I live in a place where people are not very "social" and where you don't say much more than "good day" to people you see daily. I really, really had to thank this coach but he's always so serious, so quiet and so busy that I never gathered the courage. So I took my favourite fountain pen and ink and wrote him a thank you card. I wrote: "Thank you for all what you did for my kid. Best". I sent the note to this office. I didn't sign it, and now I'm feeling quite bad. I mean, he probably wonders who sent it and he might be upset because it's not signed. I can't stop thinking about what I did, and if it was the right thing
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Mar 30, 2016 8:13:08 GMT
Don't worry too much about it, Annavalerious.
I assume you didn't sign the letter because you didn't want the trainer to feel embarrassed when he meets you. And you didn't want to confess in public that you (and your son) were so needy in that situation. You just wanted to avoid people feeling awkward. So it's fine and nothing wrong about it.
It might be that in a few weeks or months' time the trainer will learn who it was, but will then surely handle it gracefully.
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Post by annavalerious on Mar 30, 2016 9:15:10 GMT
Don't worry too much about it, Annavalerious. I assume you didn't sign the letter because you didn't want the trainer to feel embarrassed when he meets you. And you didn't want to confess in public that you (and your son) were so needy in that situation. You just wanted to avoid people feeling awkward. So it's fine and nothing wrong about it. It might be that in a few weeks or months' time the trainer will learn who it was, but will then surely handle it gracefully. Thank you Kalliope. I will try not to worry. It would be so embarrassing if he found out it was me. The school year ends in June, so I'm hoping he will need more than 2 months to find out
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Post by Deleted on Mar 30, 2016 11:06:21 GMT
Really, don't worry. It's what makes us human. ;-)
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nevamo
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Post by nevamo on Mar 30, 2016 15:16:42 GMT
It's such a thoughtful gesture, I don't think you'd have to be embarrassed if he found out who sent it.
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Post by ritak on Mar 30, 2016 15:28:15 GMT
How would you feel if you received an anonymous thank you letter? Quite honestly, it would warm my heart to receive such a letter. It would make me smile to think that I did something to help a child and I would be grateful that someone took the time to express their gratitude. I didn't sign it, and now I'm feeling quite bad. I mean, he probably wonders who sent it and he might be upset because it's not signed. I can't stop thinking about what I did, and if it was the right thing annavalerious, you have written a sincere note of thanks to someone your son admires. I can't imagine that the recipient would be upset even if it wasn't signed. Please don't feel bad. Expressing gratitude is never a bad thing. Maybe more people should follow your example.
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Post by chojo on Mar 30, 2016 19:14:11 GMT
I wrote a thank you card once and now I have a friend that I could not be without, as others have said you did a good thing don't think about the negatives that probably won't happen, think about the fact that it could be the first time he's ever been thanked for doing his job and could well be feeling utterly delighted now. All thanks to you.
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bruce
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Post by bruce on Mar 30, 2016 20:01:21 GMT
What a thoughtful thing to do. It's small gestures like these that often make a difference in the lives of others. As a tutor, I always was thankful that someone occasionally recognized the hard work and effort that goes into working with others and encouraged me to continue to do better. I wouldn't worry about not signing your name. As they say, it's the thought that counts. (Bravo)
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Post by DJW1066 on Mar 30, 2016 20:51:59 GMT
Giving a sincere thank you is always the right thing to do. Not signing your name means it's about the trainer and his good work, rather than about you and your child, and spares your child being singled out inappropriately. And I'm sure this more than compensates for the inevitable nasty cranky complaints he gets that are also likely anonymous. As the trainer would say: "good job Annavalerious!".
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Post by distractedmom on Mar 31, 2016 1:37:05 GMT
My husband has coached my son's baseball teams for 10 years now. I am not sure that he has ever gotten a handwritten thank you note. I applaud you for doing that. The anonymous nature shouldn't be an issue since you were being positive and grateful. An anonymous letter of complaint, well, that's a different story. This is fine and I am sure will be well-received.
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Post by annavalerious on Mar 31, 2016 6:22:51 GMT
Thank you all for your kind answers! You made me feel a lot better. I'm a straightforward person and hiding under the cloak of anonymity is not something I like to do, but I suppose it's better like this. Like DJW1066 said, if I had signed it, my son could be singled out. I'm so glad I decided to start this thread. You've saved me a lot of headaches Thank you!
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Post by skye on Apr 2, 2016 15:42:56 GMT
Where I work we get an occasional thank you note. It isnt addressed to anyone in particular nor is it signed. However that does not take away from the awww factor. I gather the important thing for you was to let him know that what he did was appreciated and I am sure you succeeded. Kudos to you for taking the time to write a thank you note. That is something I think about doing however I never seem to do it.
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Post by DJW1066 on Apr 3, 2016 16:31:33 GMT
On those rare occasions when I get very good service from a "customer facing" person, be it a help-desk on line, or even a store salesperson, I ask for their boss' email address. This probably makes them nervous, but I then fire a quick note to their boss commending the person who was so helpful. A couple of times I actually got a reply from the boss, thanking for the feedback. One sent me a coupon for a store discount; I guess they were more used to complaints and that was their standard response. I've tried sending a handwritten thank you, but it seems to just end up as a good intention with no execution.
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Post by annavalerious on Apr 5, 2016 18:12:04 GMT
Update: today, before training, the trainer was so happy and cheerful (it was the first day of training after I sent the card). The funny (and a bit sad) thing is, that he thought it was another mother the one who sent it and they were chatting happily about it in front of me!! While he was saying how nice it was and how grateful he was, she didn't deny it and she played along, battling her eyelashes and saying "it was nothing, really", and blushing deeply. So, it looks like I have nothing to worry about. Obviously this woman had a crush on him and I made it easier for her (she's married, though)... but it's sad that she lies to his face like that. Some people are really twisted.
So, I suppose all ended well...
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Post by distractedmom on Apr 5, 2016 18:23:37 GMT
Update: today, before training, the trainer was so happy and cheerful (it was the first day of training after I sent the card). The funny (and a bit sad) thing is, that he thought it was another mother the one who sent it and they were chatting happily about it in front of me!! While he was saying how nice it was and how grateful he was, she didn't deny it and she played along, battling her eyelashes and saying "it was nothing, really", and blushing deeply. So, it looks like I have nothing to worry about. Obviously this woman had a crush on him and I made it easier for her (she's married, though)... but it's sad that she lies to his face like that. Some people are really twisted. So, I suppose all ended well... Ha! I've gotten myself into awkward situations where I misunderstood something early in conversation and then just played along to avoid awkwardness. In fact, a girl I went to college with, whom I haven't seen in 20 or more years, "reminded" me the other day that I broke her hand at softball practice one day with an errant throw. I have absolutely zero recollection of that, but it was loud, I could barely hear her and I'll likely never see her again, so I just smiled and nodded. Otherwise the conversations was going to be, "are you insane?"
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